Can you believe it?

[Feywalker]

I gave my neice a scarf for christmas. Okay, she's five, for the record. It was the fox collar from Crochet! mag. on her, it's a scarf. She loved it!! so did my little brother in law who's the same age and now wants one, and one that looks like a cyote, and one that looks like a dog...ect. Anyway, she loved it so much that she wore it to school the next day. Well, some of the boys were picking on her for it so the teachers banned her from wearing it to school again. I was so heartbroken for her. Apparently she cried when they told her she couldn't wear it. It just made me so very mad cause she got punished for their inability to control the other students. Grrrr

[MsSuzKelly]

Ugh. That is the pits. Schools are kind of crazy these days!!!

[CrochetKitten]

That is unbelievable! To punish a child for getting picked on? If I were that child's mother, I would really give the school a piece of my mind. And possibly request my daughter be moved to a different class, because that teacher is clearly too lazy to do any REAL mediation.

[pampsmom]

Good thing I'm not the mother, I'd be up at that school and in the principals face in a heart beat. They had no right to pick on her, scarf or not! That is the point. She is not the one to take the blunt of the incident. I would not let this slide! They need to get their priorities straight.

[mommy2jj3604]

That is horrible!! Your poor niece! for you and your niece and to the ignorant school people who choose to punish your niece instead of the bully's. This is exactly why I don't want my kids to go to school because the good ones are punished and the bad ones are allowed to do what they want.

[darski]

A few years back when I was taking care of my DGD, she wore a pretty summer dress that had a slight cut out at the back (about 4 square") and it had an X worked over the opening. The boys started calling her names and she was made to wear her coat in class - by the teacher. (Tell me again about how sex ed teaches responsibility)

 

Well, the next time she wanted to wear it she just put the coat on and was so upset because the harassment continued. I sat down and wrote a note to the school mentioning, the Board of Education, lawyers and sexual harassment. I further pointed out that one of the purposes of the sex ed class was to teach respect for each other.

 

That afternoon, the boys were rounded up and made to apologize. The coat came off and all had learned something.

 

It doesn't hurt to put this sort of thing into terms they can understand - like dollars and cents. If you want to harass a little girl, you will pay in big bucks." any lawyer worth his salt can make a case for you"on some grounds. Most schools have a zero tolerance policy (whether they follow it or not) against bullying.

 

Personally, I would make her one for every day in the school week.

[Cherri]

A few years back when I was taking care of my DGD, she wore a pretty summer dress that had a slight cut out at the back (about 4 square") and it had an X worked over the opening. The boys started calling her names and she was made to wear her coat in class - by the teacher. (Tell me again about how sex ed teaches responsibility)

 

Well, the next time she wanted to wear it she just put the coat on and was so upset because the harassment continued. I sat down and wrote a note to the school mentioning, the Board of Education, lawyers and sexual harassment. I further pointed out that one of the purposes of the sex ed class was to teach respect for each other.

 

That afternoon, the boys were rounded up and made to apologize. The coat came off and all had learned something.

 

It doesn't hurt to put this sort of thing into terms they can understand - like dollars and cents. If you want to harass a little girl, you will pay in big bucks." any lawyer worth his salt can make a case for you"on some grounds. Most schools have a zero tolerance policy (whether they follow it or not) against bullying.

 

Personally, I would make her one for every day in the school week.

 

 

Way to go, Darski! I totally agree!! I don't know how they can tell a little girl not to wear a scarf so the boys won't make fun of her. That's rediculous!!

[Ladycrochat]

WHAT THE:think ? Seems very unfair to punish her for the other students misbehavior! I would go and speak to the Principal and her teacher. They are punishing the wrong kid!

[cgd]

Why do they want to blame the victim? I agree that the teacher is being lazy. The scarf is not inappropriate or against the dress code, so it should be allowed, period, and the little jerks who picked on her should be the ones punished.

[snugsmontreal]

oh man i agree with all the others that say that teacher should be glad i am not the mom, i wouldnt just give her a piece of my mind and i wouldnt go down ther either i would go straight to the school board and mention if this is not rectifed YESTERDAY that i would be bringing a lawyer with me, and i agree with this whole zero tolerance policy, the schools have it but this like this happen instead of enforcing the olicy.... what good does that do?! please do tell me!

[snugsmontreal]

on a side note i just mentioned this thread to DH and you know what he said to do, call up the school board and give them the chance to fix their mistake before you call the local news and give them the headline "victim punished, bullys allowed to win at X school!" i bet that would aid them in getting it right before that got out!

[mizduck]

I'm with everyone else...if I were the mom.... Sorry your neice had to go through that, but on the bright side remember that what goes around comes around. for y'all.

[Auntie Kellie]

The poor kid. If she were my neice or daughter, I'd make her one of every animal so she'd have a bunch to wear to school then I'd go to the school and give the teacher and the principle a large piece of my mind. Not to mention I'd also make phone calls to the school board for apologies to her for allowing the bullies to make her feel bad.

 

Hugs and Cookies (especially for your niece)

Auntie K

[Feywalker]

I wish I could have done that. She's in a different state and her mom was doing college finals and Dad's a marine Recruiter so I really understand how they don't have time for that fight. With three kids they have to pick and choose their fights well. I don't think it helped that their fairly new and it's a big school. Still. Now the true question is, what do I make her next Christmas he he he.

[NanaM3]

In my town's schools there're now formalized policies against harrasment and bullying. This sounds to me like a case of bullying. Surely that school can compromise and let her wear it to and from and on the playground but perhaps not in the classroom if they truly consider it a distraction. I might buy that argument. But unless there's a dress code she's breaking what earthly right do they have to dictate her clothing?

 

Also, do any of the students wear one of the cute animal shaped backpacks? That would fall under the same "logic" they're applying here against the scarf.

 

At least no harm came to the scarf! That's what I feared when I started to read your thread!

 

Oftentimes nowadays teachers and administrations err on the side of over-caution ... so many lawsuits are started on next to nothing ... and I know our kids need to witness us as partners with, not against, the schools so that they will respect the teachers/education ... but common sense and just plain fairness MUST be expected and insisted.

 

This scarf matter needs to be addressed, respectfully of course, by the School Board.

[01buckler15]

I wish I could have done that. She's in a different state and her mom was doing college finals and Dad's a marine Recruiter so I really understand how they don't have time for that fight. With three kids they have to pick and choose their fights well. I don't think it helped that their fairly new and it's a big school. Still. Now the true question is, what do I make her next Christmas he he he.

 

I was on the bullied side of things. We moved a lot (not military), and I stopped making friends after a while. My mom never knew most of what went on at school. I wish that she had made more of an effort. But that's a whole other story...

As a mother, I would have picked that as a fight worth taking!

Make her another animal scarf! Snake, puppy, dragon, kitty... minds the limit

[Ellie 13]

I agree the bullies shoukd be punished. I say don't just deal with the school/teachers, write the parents of the bulllies a nice letter letting them know what their kids did the (school won't), how it's a bad reflection on the parents etc. If parents don't teach good manners at that age, they'll never learn.

Ellie 13 P.S. You don't have to sign it.

[Lady_of_Roses]

I'd say that the parents need to make some noise to the school letting them know that this isn't ok at all. The school system is going to have their little girl for 12 years, and right now it's telling that girl that bullies have more rights than victims.

 

I'd probably go with Darski's idea. Except I wouldn't make additional collars until things settled down, because from the sounds of it they'd probably just get confiscated.

[iamnichole]

sheww!!! dont get me started on the school system! ugh! what has the world come to? that poor little girl.