Snuggles Project

[catsncrochet]

Has anyone ever had the problem of a family member not supporting what you do? Ok, before I jump ahead of myself, here's the situation. I'm out of work and have plenty of time to "hook," so I've been doing just that. My brother is getting married this summer and I'm making a queen sized afghan for him and his bride to be for a wedding present. This afghan has turned into a monstrosity of white...the reason being I want to make it big enough for a queen sized bed, however, I didn't realize what I was getting into, how long it was going to take, etc...

 

Anyway, yesterday I was surfing on the web and found the website for the Snuggles Project. I thought making snuggles would be a great way to break up my crocheting a little. I'm afraid if I continue to work on the wedding afghan that I'll burn out on it and it won't get finished. Plus, there's the fact that I'm an animal person...more so than a people person. lol. I feel very passionate about helping out animals in shelters and figure this is something I can do to help.

 

The fun began last night at dinner. I mentioned to mom that I was going to be doing the snuggles and she piped in..."or you could crochet for the kids in the hospital." Also, she went on to say that she didn't like the idea of crocheted blankets for dogs or cats, because of their claws getting caught on them. I just firmly told her that there are already plenty of organizations with people that get what they need, but animals get overlooked somehow. I told her this was what I wanted to do and I was going to do it.

 

After I said what I needed to say, she got quiet...because how could she argue with that, right? But why she has a problem with me wanting to do something that I'm passionate about...I honestly don't get it. She does stuff that I don't like to do yet she enjoys doing it and I haven't ever told her not to do it and I won't. If she likes doing something like gardening...whereas I'm more of an indoor person and prefer crocheting...I at least try to be interested in it when she's rambling on and on about it.

 

But the moment I mention something I'm interested in, it's like she's waited for that specific moment to slam me down. And once she gets started, every other sentence out of her mouth is like a kick in the stomach.

 

Am I doing something wrong?

 

BTW...my husband supports me in anything I want to do...he always has. He's a wonderful man. I have friends that support me. All my other family members support me...except mom. What gives?

[elaines630]

I think animals need all the extra help and attention they can get!! I have a 2nd blanket in the works for the snuggles project! I have about 25 skeins of yarn (small ones) that I am only going to use for the snuggles blankets. I support the charity and you!!!

[RoseRed]

It must be a mom thing - mine's not much different.

 

I can tell you from experience tho that crocheted blankies for dogs don't hold up real well - especially if they scratch before they lay down.

[catsncrochet]

Thanks Elaines630...

 

My first snuggle that I started yesterday, I'm 9 rows into. It's a start. I have a considerable stash that I plan on using up this way.

[StarStrong]

Maybe your mom is jealous that you have found a project to get involved in.... go for it!!! The animals need attention also.

Btw I think Snuggles is a good way to use up scrap yarn - the feel is what is important - not the colors.

Enjoy!!! Deborah

 

P.S. I do have to say that not all moms are like that... my mother and father are both very involved and supportive of the project I run.

[PBLKNP]

I think it's a wonderful thing! I'm tempted to do it myself, as my local vet has been so kind to send me home with various towels/blankets and things for my pets when they've been ill. Animals need attention, too.

[Angeleyz14]

Your mom sounds just like my MIL. She is awful. Although she slams my dh even if it is about animals (she fosters & works with her local humane society) which they both love. I got to the point a few years ago that it is a mother thing. Though not all are like that, my grandmother is wonderful and supportive of all her 6 kids (even my mother who is a total piece of obstinate, stubborn work). Heck you might as well call me her 7th child since she raised me more than my own mother...probably why I have such issues with my MIL and how she is (and lucky us gets to see her in less than 2 weeks when she comes to visit to see her newest granddaughter).

*HUGS* Just remind yourself she has her charities and such for people so it's only fair/right that you are helping the over-looked furry ones:D.

Heck if we weren't so poor I'd be making the round beds and lots of quick and easy and comfy blankets for them, but extra $$ and yarn just aren't in the budget for us with Harmony due March 4th. Enjoy knowing there are a lot of people who believe in and support what you are doing!!!!!

[frogsrock]

Also, she went on to say that she didn't like the idea of crocheted blankets for dogs or cats, because of their claws getting caught on them.

that is a very valid point though, i have 2 dogs and i know from experience their claws do get caught in them fairly often, it REALLY upsets them when it happens i've even seen them get their teeth caught

I can tell you from experience tho that crocheted blankies for dogs don't hold up real well - especially if they scratch before they lay down.

yup that too my dogs totally ruined a blanket by scratching it, they pulled too many loops and its just bad (it was one of grandmoms WIPs, she gave up on it)

[Pyroteca]

I think it is wonderful that you are helping animals. I have made several afghans for my two little rescued kitties and my MIL's dog. Admittedly, they won't last forever, but that doesn't really matter. You can always make another one.

 

On the subject of mothers, I think it is hard for any parent to support something that they don't understand. My mom tries to understand the whole crafty thing, but it isn't really her bag. Still, she is better about being supportive then your mother appears to be. I know it is hard, but just try to ignore her, and remind her that you are an adult, and can make your own choices. A lot of times I think that parents are like that when they have not realized that you are all grown up and don't need or want their advice on what you should be doing.

 

Kudos for making blankets for the oft-overlooked kitties and puppies.

[everkutz]

I have made about 24 Snuggles in different sizes and shapes and the county animal shelter needed them! They were delivered there in two different stacks, about 2 months apart. I have run into a few people (while I'm crocheting in doctors' offices, etc.) who ask why I crochet such pretty things for a cat. My answer....because the animals need to stay comfortable and warm too. There will always be doubters and the negative people. Ignore them and go with your passion. There are many crocheters who make pretty things for those in the hospitals and nursing homes and that if fine with me. I will crochet my scrap yarn into warm blankets for homeless cats!

[2kute]

My mother was always like that. It didn't matter what I did, I should be doing something else.

I make Snuggles for the local humane society and they love them. they are always wanting more and it's not even that cold here ever. They told me the blankets bring comfort to the animals.

Try to make them not so 'holey.'

 

Good job. Keep doing what makes you happy

[ScoobyDoo0811]

I recently started doing the Snuggles project too. I made a few and took them to my local animal shelter and they absolutely loved them and are anxious to get more. I don't make mine in the form of a blanket, if you will. I make mine more in the form of a rug or mat, using 2 strands of yarn, to make them thicker. So far I have donated 15 snuggles and one kitty bed. I use all my scrap yarn to make them with, because the nice thing is the animals don't care what color they are and if the colors match or even what pattern you use. They are just grateful to have something warm and soft to lay on. Anything is better than a cold concrete floor or metal cage bottom.

 

As far as your mother is concerned, I know how you feel. My mother is the same way. She didn't support me when I decided to go to school . She thought I should be working and not wasting my time on an education. But who do you think was there, and oh so proud when I graduated with honors? You got it, the one who didn't support me. I am still in school doing my thing regardless of whether or not I have support from her, I get the support I need from others. And needless to say, school is not a topic my mother and I discuss often. It is best that way. I think what you are doing is fabulous and continue doing what you like and what makes you feel good because it doesn't really matter what others think as long as you feel good. I have always said, if we always did what others wanted us to do or if we let others influence our choices we would be a bunch of miserable people. Opinions are good, and I respect them, but they are opinions, what works for you may not work or settle well with others and vice versa. I agree with you on the principle that there are plenty of people out there supporting the babies in NICU etc...... but who really supports the animals. Keep up the good work and do what you believe in and what is best for you. I will support you if no one else does.

[zeropixie]

Here is how my Ginger feels about this.

 

 

She stole my black and red round ripple and won't give it back, but how can I argue. She 'digs' in it alot and it's holding up just fine.

[cgd]

Sometimes we have to agree to disagree with our loved ones. But it isn't cool for your mother to criticize you. On the contrary, she should be proud she raised such a sensitive, empathic person who cares about making the world a better place for people or animals. I tend to change the conversation when people get that way with me. When they voice their criticism, I say something like, "I never thought about it that way, hmm," or "thank you for sharing." No one can argue with that. Then I start talking about something else. By not giving them the fight they're obviously looking for, the wind starts going out of their sails. If she does keep on, you can thank her for her concern but gently and firmly remind her that you've decided to do this and you two will agree to disagree. Sometimes boundaries have to be set for us to keep our sanity!

[RoseRed]

Here is how my Ginger feels about this.

 

 

She stole my black and red round ripple and won't give it back, but how can I argue. She 'digs' in it alot and it's holding up just fine.

 

give it time. I made ghans for my dog and my moms dog and it took a while but the digging does it's damage. Lucky for me my dog isn't too big so it didn't take a long time to make his blanket. My Dad's dog is about 6 pounds and her blankie has held up the best.

[MimiFL]

With me, it's the charity work and presents that my family doesn't get at all. Sis and Mom try to restrain themselves usually but I know they don't like the idea. Dad is more vocal. He doesn't understand why I do things for people when they probably won't be doing anything for me in return (almost a direct quote from him the other day). I totally don't get that. I don't care that anybody does anything 'in return'.

 

Right now, I'm making a shawl for a friend of mine, and it didn't go down too well. They consider it a waste of time and money (says dad: 'what's she going to do for you?' me: 'she's my friend!!'). Oh well. The charity squares went down a little better.

 

Now, I'm not rich, and Sis and Mom have told me before they don't like to see me spending my hard earned money on 'free' things like that. Plus, they're convinced that it's 'hard work', when actually, I love crocheting! So, maybe it's really concern more than anything else from them. I've told them I don't mind, plus it's one of the reasons I have extra jobs, so I can buy yarn to make nice gifts and charity squares. In any case, I try to avoid mentioning anything 'free' when I'm around Dad. (though living in the same house makes this more difficult)

[2kute]

thankfully my hubby supports me. See, I can no longer work due to health issues, he's the only provider, but he's happy that I use my skills to help someone else. He knows it makes me feel good. My children, including my two SIL also support me and they think I am cool cause I make all these things for charity.

They always want photos and see the things before I mail them. I even get input them like colors and so forth. Guess I am blessed

[pragmatica]

Many people before me have done a great job of saying what I think -- that you should continue making snuggles if that's what you want to do, and people who don't understand what motivates us to crochet or to donate our crocheted items probably never will, and the relationship between mothers and daughters is frequently complex and fraught with unexpected obstacles (certainly I never thought I'd find so many ways to disappoint my own mother), and so on. So I second all that, and more power to ya if it makes you happy.

 

What I do have to contribute, which I know from the shelter I work with and may have seen other people mention here as well, is that shelter animals who have little blankies in their cages get adopted more easily than those who don't. It's like staging a house that you're trying to sell by making it seem more appealing. Little puppies and kitties sitting on a little blanket -- even if it's made out of the most goshawful scratchy acrylic in 1970s colors that you've got in your stash -- look more like an animal that people can imagine in their homes. So you're not just comforting the little critters, you're helping them find their forever homes.

 

Just my $.02...

 

--Elissa

[ScoobyDoo0811]

Many people before me have done a great job of saying what I think -- that you should continue making snuggles if that's what you want to do, and people who don't understand what motivates us to crochet or to donate our crocheted items probably never will, and the relationship between mothers and daughters is frequently complex and fraught with unexpected obstacles (certainly I never thought I'd find so many ways to disappoint my own mother), and so on. So I second all that, and more power to ya if it makes you happy.

 

What I do have to contribute, which I know from the shelter I work with and may have seen other people mention here as well, is that shelter animals who have little blankies in their cages get adopted more easily than those who don't. It's like staging a house that you're trying to sell by making it seem more appealing. Little puppies and kitties sitting on a little blanket -- even if it's made out of the most goshawful scratchy acrylic in 1970s colors that you've got in your stash -- look more like an animal that people can imagine in their homes. So you're not just comforting the little critters, you're helping them find their forever homes.

 

Just my $.02...

 

--Elissa

 

I agree with that 100%, and the lady at my local shelter told me that the also. That is why they like the snuggles for the animals.

[craftconnie1]

My mother could never understand charity of any kind; her attitude was always if you don't get paid its not ' real ' work. Her loss. giving to your charity of choice is your business and I have found that sometimes you have to separate parts of your life from your loved ones. Be thankful to the ones that support your efforts and ignore the rest. Bless you for caring.

[Christina92786]

I think that a lot of moms are like that. My mom is the opposite, but my friends mom is always criticizing and what not. I think its partially because they want you be be like them. Moms like the quality time and want you to do their hobbies, which is why it is lucky my mom and I get along so well, but I think that in instances where your hobbies or tastes don't always coincide you end up with a critical momma. Ultimately you have to keep on doing what makes you happy and I think talking to her about her criticism could really help the situation. My friend's mom didn't realize what it was doing to her self esteem and spirit until my friend told her, and now they get along MUCH better and compromise when they do things together! Maybe you could garden with your mom and let her teach you that (and get your daily vitamin D!) and she could in turn learn how to crochet? Or take her with you to the animal shelter so she can see how much the animals appreciate something cuddly!

[Maggie1956TN]

I think what you are going to be doing is super. I love animals and have 3 dogs and 2 cats that would have been put to sleep or somebody killed them had I not adopted them. I think animals are very overlooked so keep up the super job you are doing and try not to let what your mother's words were hurt so much. May you be blessed in what you are doing.

[catsncrochet]

Thank you to everyone who has shown their support on here. I knew I could come here and seek the approval I needed to stay motivated. There's nothing worse than getting excited about doing something, telling mom about it, and having her suck the life out of the idea from her negativity. I've come to realize that it seems the best thing to do is avoid this topic with her entirely.

 

The funny thing is...she's the one that taught me to crochet...back when I was in high school. We used to crochet together. She lost interest in crocheting years ago. She works at home and that eats up most of her time. She attempted to start a baby blanket for one of her neighbors a couple years ago, but I think she only got a couple rows into it and stopped.

[Lady_of_Roses]

Try not to feel too bad. There are a lot of people who were raised to believe that people are #1 and until all of them are helped, critters shouldn't get any. Often, these same folks are the ones who think that shelter animals are nothing but mutts and undesirables anyhow. They want purebreds and will pay a lot for that!

 

But thankfully, that is exactly why there are so many different charities. So that we can help people, animals, or whatever cause we want that we feel strongly about.