Do your friends and family appreciate your crochet gifts?

[anthrilliel]

Hi, I was wondering if what happens to me, happens to others as well...

None of my friends will appreciate what I could make for them, they refer to crocheting as something old people do:eek . They think I am wasting my time:no . They like a presents to be bought, as they think that the only reason someone would give em a handmade present is cause it is cheaper and easier I make everything with love and caring, a lot of effort and time and usually something handmade costs more than something from a mass production store (obviously..) So, I was wondering if I am the only one who cannot share this passion and/or have people who at least appreciate the effort put on an item made especially for them.

I am really lucky that my fiance supports me on this, or I would have given in to all this pressure and stop That was of course before I found the ville This is great and feels like home

[eurolyons]

Most of my family now does appreciate what I do...I think part of the reason is because they have gotten used to the fact that this is what I do...I'm a very creative person and have been all my life and now they equate something handmade (like crocheting or sewn) with me...many of them tell me now that when they see something crocheted, they think of me...even my one sister that really doesn't like receiving handmade items from me...she appreciates the time, money and effort, but it's just not her thing and I try to respect that.

 

Part of it too is that I never gave up being creative just because others (strangers, friends or family) may not have liked my stuff because it looked, "homemade and cheap..." Practise, practise, practise...

 

They've accepted that I'm far happier and peaceful with a crochet hook in my hand or behind a sewing machine than not. So only rarely do I hear something akin to "you're wasting your time..."

 

I look at it now as I've "earned their admiration" because I've stayed true to myself inspite of everything.

 

But to be fair, I've had to learn to back off a little too...not push my craft of people (like my one sister) if they really don't get it...I try not to take them personally (because really at least in my sister's case, they don't mean it personally, it really has to do with them, not me...)

 

The thing that I have to deal with now is that many feel frustrated that I am "wasting my talent" because I don't actively pursue making money at it...and the only reason I pay attention to that line of thinking is simply because I do want to make money at it, but I "don't feel ready" because I'm really afraid of rejection from the paying public...but I'll get over that eventually.

 

If you like what you are doing, keep doing it...keep practising, don't be swayed by your detractors. One thing you have right now that I really didn't have for a good couple of decades was this site as a source of support. I have a few family members and a few friends who do crochet, but they don't take it as seriously as I do. They don't have scores of pattern books, full sets of hooks, part of a room full of yarn...because it's just a low priority hobby to them...it's a lifestyle to me now...and that's okay...but I now have this site...

 

I also have a husband that totally supports my endeavors...and of course, the best way he supports me is by letting me make him sweaters and other things. He wears all the sweaters I've ever made him...even if they don't look that great to me...he loves them...

 

Keep at your craft...because I believe that in due time, your friends and family (most of them anyway) will grow to appreciate your skills, talent and art...and they might even clamor for some of them down the road.

[WendyLee]

I guess I have been either lucky or dense could be dense; but my family and friends have appreciated the crochet gifts. Even the girls I work with have loved the stuff I have made.

 

I do let them know how expensive or cheap the yarns I am working with are and since I do a lot of crochet during my lunch breaks and such they see what is involved. Specially when I start frogging .

 

For my family I don't know exactly what has made us all feel that a hand made gift is better but quite a few of us are crafty. My Grandmother knitted and hooked rugs, we grew up seeing that as well as Grandpa baking breads and GM making jams and canning.

 

If someone doesn't appreciate what I do, I simply don't give it to them. I do however make sure they see it, and all of these wonderful yarns and cool patterns makes some pretty nice stuff! Some have had to rethink things but they will never get it free from me!

[econ-nerd]

It varies but I think I have had more positive reactions to things I have given away. I usually make baby blankets that I give to friends for gifts at baby showers.

 

Once I had two colleagues at work expecting at the same time and made them both blankets. They opened the gifts at the same time and one seemed dissinterested in the gift and the other gave me a bear hug that I thought might break a few ribs And she is the one who in general seemed more cool and removed from emotion (although pregnancy may have had a lot to do with it )

 

But I still love making them and giving them away and won't quit. The majority seem to like them though

[carovan]

I tend to make things for my grandkids (clothes, doll clothes, toys, blankets). They LOVE anything that Nana makes for them and since most of the things I make come in the mail, they really love to get their surprises. I haven't felt secure enough in my crocheting to make something for another adult other than myself.

[walker1021]

My personal experiences with giving crocheted items as gifts has almost always been on the positive side. I mainly make afghans, but have been known to make scarves and a couple purses. The girls at work are "amazed" at what I can do with yarn. Family members seem happy when they get the hand made gift at Christmas time. My brother has even hinted what my nephews favorite colors are so I can make them afghans for this Christmas. My kid's friends have all asked for afghans or scarves.

So, I guess it just depends on the person who receives the gift. It has nothing to do with you or your talents. Some people just don't appreciate or understand the time and effort it takes to make that special gift. Nothing bad against them and nothing bad against you. So, keep your hooks a flying. Keep doing what makes you happy. Find a charity group to donate your items to. Or give them to your local churches to be passed out to needy families. There will always be someone who will benefit greatly from your handi work.

[lis]

I think that with any gift-giving, it's important to give something that you think the recipient will like, not what you like (or am trying to get rid of). This is what makes a thoughtful gift. I've come across folks who give away stuff (handmade or otherwise) simply because they're trying to offload them for a number of reasons (eg. taking up space) and not because they think the recipient will genuinely like them. Handmade gifts may not be everyone's cup of tea. After all, I'm sure that at some point, we've received a gift that while we may have appreciated the thought and effort, it isn't exactly our... thang.

[anthrilliel]

Thank you all for your support, I guess you are right that some people don t like handmade things, but at least I would expect a nice word. Thank you all for your support We are all together here so...

[RoseRed]

Most of my family and friends go bonkers for the things that I make. But over the years, i've also learned who to make for and who NOT to.

 

I think the worst show of ignorance I was ever a part of was at my friends baby shower. I worked for weeks - crocheting, sewing, albums, (I was supposed to be Godmother) you name it - I made it. If someone had bought this stuff at a craft show it would've ran at least $500. As it was I had over $100 just in materials. (Thank God I'm a packrat and had lots of it at home anyway)

 

She finishes opening the presents, says "Thanx for everything, I know you didn't have the money to buy stuff." Needless to say her sisters and mother went bonkers on her - I went outside and cried.

 

I love making presents. I love the happiness it brings to people. but don't insult me over it!

 

When I post pics of the things I make I love to add the stories that go with them.

[anthrilliel]

:eek what? awww this must have hurt :hug this is why I am afraid to give what I make to people, but you are all so nice here, and we have each other :cheer

[neatlytangled]

I've had good reactions but I've not ever given anything to anyone I didn't know would be ok with that. I'm too big a coward to change a bad reaction, lol. Luckily, there are enough people in the family who love handmade things that I'm in no danger of running out of homes for my creations.

[Cherri]

I've found that some people appreciate them and some don't. You have to discern which people to give hand-made things to and not take it personally if they don't appreciate them. I know it can hurt your feelings though.

[loopy_jess]

When I was tiny one of my grandmothers used to make my sisters and I matching gifts - soft dolls, crocheted bags and soft toys. At the time I thought nothing much of it (being small means you don't really understand the time and effort that goes into stuff, you just know what you like and what you don't) - but really did like the handmade gifts the most for some reason.

 

Now when I make gifts for my small nieces I hope that they too will love them and that they will become part of their childhood. Kids are easy to make for - they are not as 'brand' conscious as teenagers and so like something for what it is and not what other people will think of it.

 

Other than my nieces and the occasional baby gift I don't really make anything for anyone unless they have specifically asked for it. This doesn't seem to stop people requesting things though - I always seem to be 'overdue' on things I've promised to make up for people. My friends and family all seem to really admire and love the objects that I make up - which really gives me a real buzz

 

However, I would not make something unless I was certain someone really would like it - it is so hard to know someones taste that well! A beautiful item that you've spent months over and that you would love for yourself may well find its way to the back of a cupboard because you simply gave it to the wrong person. People should always be polite when receiving a gift, especially if it's been handmade - but if someone honestly doesn't like something wouldn't you prefer to know rather than keep spending your time make items that are being wasted on them?

[anthrilliel]

but if someone honestly doesn't like something wouldn't you prefer to know rather than keep spending your time make items that are being wasted on them?

 

I see your point you are right, maybe it s just the way people say it... And I don t want to force someone to like something, just to appreciate that crochet is something lot of people do cause it s fun and creative, I have never given something I ve made to anyone but my fiance ( who thinks everything I do is wow ) I just wish we lived in a world where we could actually do what we like to without having people criticize something they know nothing about.

Thank you all for all your support Every time I come here, I know I am among friends :yay

[darcee]

My friends and family actually ask for hand made gifts from me. A niece gets 3 ornaments each year, aunt gets a doily, granddaughters get afghan and sweaters, brothers get ornaments, everyone gets pot holders. I make one treetop angel each year and go down the line of nieces

[eurolyons]

I see your point you are right, maybe it s just the way people say it... And I don t want to force someone to like something, just to appreciate that crochet is something lot of people do cause it s fun and creative, I have never given something I ve made to anyone but my fiance ( who thinks everything I do is wow ) I just wish we lived in a world where we could actually do what we like to without having people criticize something they know nothing about.

Thank you all for all your support Every time I come here, I know I am among friends :yay

 

That is one thing that is kind of universal...wanting acceptance for who we are and what we do. There's always going to be someone who for whatever reason just doesn't get why anyone would paint or do pottery or knit or sew or crochet or well you name it. The arts are looked down on unless someone seems to have godly gifts and even then...someone will still say something like, "yeah but what about a "real" job?" But that's on the other person, not on the one who creates.

 

I'm so glad that to your fiance, everything you do is "wow..." That's how my DH is with me and actually for the most part how my exH was with me too...

 

And yep, you're definately among friends here.

[Shani]

I haven't had a bad reaction yet, maybe everyone was just being nice I don't know. I've been giving away cushions with a yarn back and fluffy front for years. I have one friend who isn't crafy in that way at all, and the first time I gave her a crochet cusion she showed it to everyone who dropped in, the matched set are on her bed now. I get requests from family for their own when they see the ones others have got.

Maybe I've just been lucky..

[alibra]

I think most people equate crocheting with being 100 years old and in a rocking chair. That all we can make are doilies...heck they should check it out..lots of new and exciting things can be made using crochet. My family and friends are very supportive, as well as grateful whenever I give them something hand made. My children are all grown and now they put in their orders, hats, scarves, mittens..afghans. I love doing this and no one will ever stop me..enjoy what you do and give your gifts to those who will appreciate your talents. Charities are always looking for good people to help them...

[chrissyf]

Everyone I have gifted with a crocheted gift appreciates what I do. For example, my office manager was so impressed by the cupcake pincushions I made that she wants me to make a whole kitchen of crocheted goodies for her daughter's play kitchen. These are people who make a lot of money but still appreciate the work in a homemade gift. Don't give up.

[ArielManx]

I have been lucky so far to have nothing but good reactions to the gifts I've made and given to friends and family. Those who are crafters themselves understand the work that goes into a handmade gift, and those who aren't crafters still appreciate that someone would take the time to make them something.

 

I can't believe anyone would think making a gift is easier that buying one! Good grief, it takes no effort at all to buy a gift card... but that's what some people want...

 

That said, there are people in my life I know would not appreciate a handmade gift, so they don't get any. And for weddings I do buy a gift off the couple's registry, because I remember getting married and my husband and I trying to set up house with our mismatch of things from single life - I appreciated every handmade gift we got, but I needed the iron and pots and pans, ya know?

[Crocus58]

Unfortunately there are always going to be those people who value money more than time. They either have not learned, or were never taught to value someone else's time. There is one thing everyone in the world has the same amount of and that is time - we all have 24 hours in a day. We can always earn more money, but we can never earn more time.

 

If I discover that someone values my money (purchased gifts) more than my time (hand made gifts) then I do not waste my time, I spend my money. Luckily, most of the people in my life value my time and talent more than my spending power.

 

I think it harkens back to the time when "home made" meant some one was too poor or cheap to buy something and somehow worth less. Dollly Parton's song "Coat of Many Colors" says it better than I can.

[Ellie 13]

My family always asks what I'm working on, even if it's not their style, they still say great work. when my niece was 3 (4?) she saw a crochet snowman on a Woman's Day magazine and said "Auntie Ellie can make that for me." My sister tolded me about it, so I made it for Christmas. I think my family would say there's something wrong if I didn't show up with my "knitty-ditty" bag.

Ellie 13

[ldyer1]

One time I decided to make a photo album of my projects, so I called my mum and asked her to take a photo of something I had made her and email it to me. She couldn't even remember getting the item, let alone where it is. Now although I appreciate that memories fade, it was only a month or so before and my mum was only mid 40's!!!

 

I got witchy and said "well thats the last thing I am ever making you" and she turned to me and said "thats probably a good idea, because I really don't appreciate it, so you should give it to someone who does!" Now, a year later I decide to make my mum a stadium blanket that folds into a bag to take to my brothers ball games, and she really liked that. She is just miss practical. So I don't think it was the handmade part of the first item that she didn't like, it was the fact that for her it had no value.

 

Now I have another family, I am sort of an adopted daughter. My friend and her mum were down the other day and I was making a doily. My friend turns to me and says "I could never take string and make it look like that". She loved what I have done and has said that if I ever want to I can make her a bedspread (HAH) and her mum chimed in and said that she would love a bureau runner. I know if I ever gave them something handmade that they would treasure it. Maybe because there are a lot of quilters in that family so they know the value of hand made items.

 

Most of my other friends are intrigued by what I do, and like to see what I am working on. I make baby blankets for every baby, but I don't usually make anything else for them. What I do do, is make patterns I like and in colors that I think fit the pattern and I wait and see who asks for it! Then I give it away as a "just because"

 

So to cut a long story....long, it depends on the people and it depends on the item. Crochet to make yourself happy and your stuff will find a home.

[anthrilliel]

Thank you so much for all your support Once again, this site does feel like home

[Sylviaf]

My family seems to like what I make. I just got an e-mail from my mother-in-law to tell me she had carried the fat bottom bag I made her for Christmas to her bridge club and everyone raved about it. I know my mother and sister love what I make, and my daughters use their scarves and afghans.