Opinion needed on a gift

[crochetstepmom]

I was estranged from my family for five years until we reconciled last Christmas. Since then, I have made an afghan for each family member for his or her birthday this year. We have four December birthdays in our family (including myself,) and I will only see one of the people on Christmas Day...so I'll have to give it to him that day.

 

My dilemma is with one of my nephews who lives in another state and comes home only at Christmas. He and his girlfriend have lived together for five years, although I just met her last Christmas Day for a few hours. His birthday is in October, and I am giving his afghan to him at Christmas.

 

It happened to occur to me the other day that I didn't make one for his girlfriend. I don't want to make one for everyone in the family, but not make one for her...especially since she will be there when two of them will be presented. Someone else said to me that I don't have to make one for her because she isn't officially family. I don't like that idea at all! DH and I lived together for four years before we were married, and no one in my family treated him or his children like they weren't part of the family. They've been together for five years...she's family!

 

I thought a simple pattern with only one or two colors would work since I don't have that much time left. So, I called my sister (his mother) to find out what colors she likes, what kind of furniture they have, and a little about her personal style. I have tried to make all of the afghans reflect a little about each person.

 

My sister wasn't much help, although she did give me a couple of color suggestions. She is the type of person who gives people gifts that she likes, not necessarily what the recipient might like. That isn't always a bad thing, but in this case, I have tried to make something that the recipient would like. My sister loved the afghan that I made for one of my neices. It was a Mile a Minute afghan made with RHSS Fall for the center part and Coffee for the trim. It was very pretty if I do say so myself.

 

My problem is that I have done fourteen of them so far and they have all been different. They have all used different patterns, color schemes, etc. I don't want to make the same one for her that I made for someone else.

 

If my nephew's girlfriend had actually seen the other afghan, had fallen in love with it, and asked me to make that exact one for her, I would be happy to do that. However, I can't tell if my sister's motivation for suggesting it is that *she* liked it or not. I have already decided that I am going to make one just like that after Christmas to give to my sister.

 

So what would you do? Would you make the same MAM in the same colors? Would you use the same colors in a different pattern? Would you make something completely different?

 

Thanks!

[Scorpio59]

How very noce of you to do this for everyone. Do you really have time to make her an afghan by Christmas? Do you want to put yourself under that kind of pressure?

I might call her - talk to her- tell her that you are thinking of her and want to make her an afghan. Bring a couple of patterns that you are comfortable with to Christmas and let her pick / tell you her colors and then work on it after the holidays. Just my idea FWIW.

[crochetstepmom]

I think I have time to do it. I'm pretty fast, especially if it's dc. I have two left to finish for December birthdays, and I should have them finished by the end of November. So that will leave the majority of December to do it. I've made fourteen of them since February along with some other projects along the way. As long as I keep the pattern simple, and maybe even use a larger hook, I think I'll be fine.

[HappyOldCro]

Could you ask the nephew? Seems he would know the best. He doesn't have to know you made one for him or the rest of the family, just ask her fav colors and if she likes frilly, geometric, or plain things.

[GEMINI4659]

A nice round ripple works up fast and can look so very nice and you can make the color pattern unique

[ratdog]

If you have time make the afghan in a color that compliments the one you are giving your Nephew. a 'matched' set so to speak. If you feel like time is running out and you just cant pull it off, give her a coupon for a handmade afghan to be delivered at a future date (give a deadline if you want say, February)

 

Maybe give her a self addressed reply card that she can fill in with her color preferences and return to you.

 

I am sure EVERYONE would understand the coupon because of time constraints and needing to ask for her color preferences.

[crochetstepmom]

If you have time make the afghan in a color that compliments the one you are giving your Nephew. a 'matched' set so to speak.

 

You know, my DH said basically the same thing. I made my nephew's in Virginia Tech school colors. Actually, they met while they were both students there. DH suggested that I do the MAM pattern in the same colors. I do have some leftover yarn. I would have to buy a little more, but not much.

[Christina92786]

The idea of giving them Virginia Tech afghans is good....even after you graduate you still have to root for your school! Also, if you could, I would try to call your nephew and ask what her favorite colors are or what sorts of colors they have used in their apartment/house. I've found that for my friends who are getting married, many are using brown, which could be paired with a color that she likes. Brown and a robins egg blue sort of color are very popular together in stores and everywhere! That's so nice of you to make afghans for everybody! That's a huge job and I don't know how you got so many done! Good luck getting finished with everything before Christmas!

[Selune]

Or make a throw pillow to match the afghan.

[crochetstepmom]

Or make a throw pillow to match the afghan.

 

Thanks for the suggestion, but I'd really rather stick to afghans since that is what I made for everyone else. She will be there when I give a couple of them to the recipients. I don't want her to feel excluded. Otherwise, that's a nice idea.

[Rabbit9]

I think whatever you do will be appreciated by anyone that understands it's the thoughtfulness and being included that counts. I think if it was me I might talk to your nephew if possible or depending on if she liked the pattern or the colors I would go with what she liked and change the other. For example the same colors in a different pattern or the same pattern with different colors. Good luck.