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I am a little frustrated


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I am teaching someone who can't retain the information. I've shown the basics repeatedly, given printed illustrated instructions from the start, and spent now about 9 hours with her. She continues to ask the same questions, make the same mistakes, doubts when she IS doing it correctly, says "ok, I get it", then doesn't. She has made practice pieces the evening before and shows me her mess the next day. So, I show her again, and VOILA, she gets it, then she doesn't. If I crochet along with her, she does it right; the moment she is on her own, she is lost. If she went to a formal lesson and paid $50 for 2 hours, she'd leave and be on her own...and that is pretty much what I expect, and I'm doing this for free. I don't feel able to spend many more untold hours sitting next to her step by step...this bird MUST fly, or give up. I've shown her everything I can, and been patient and encouraging thus far. I am available with advice to anyone I've taught recently...but the re-teaching her over and over is getting annoying--and not just to me, but to the others who are actively working on their own projects (we don't always comprise the same group, but I do see each of them a few times a week). When you get comments from others that you agree with, it isn't just you! Had she been my first "student" I'd have given up trying to show anything to anyone. Any advice?????

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:hug Sorry for your pain and frustration. wild-off-the-wall guess here...is she lonely? Or truly challenged? As to advice...I'd maybe give her a (nice) warning, to the effect of "this next class will be the last one I can offer for free. after that I will have to start charging you for my time" (course that works even better if you have "free" intro courses and charge for anything above that) but if you get more like this, it might not be a bad idea to have a policy of sorts for how many re-teaches they get before they have to pay...you don't want her to ruin it for you and your other students...the idea of $ might help her learn faster, or she'll leave b/c she doesn't want to pay, or she'll pay, and you'll have something for your aggravation :lol

Of course, other than what you told us, I don't know all the ins and outs of the situation, so my suggestion may be worth zilch, but it was just-a-thot that popped into my head.

hth

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Sounds l like a learning disability, or depending on age, an age-related

memory problem. Be gentle with her, I don't think she sounds like she

is doing this on purpose.

 

I suggest you tell her as kindly as possible that crocheting doesn't seem to be the best craft for her, and suggest something else for her to try that doesn't require a lot of knowledge retention. Some of the painting crafts

perhaps? Look around a craft store and see what you can find that

is simple that she might like.

 

I taught sewing to a young woman who had a brain tumor removed, and

had the exact same problems. Each lesson was starting over from scratch.

 

Good luck!

 

Jean Leinhauser

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Whatever the reason, please do be gentle with her. I'm sure my experience is not the case with you, but many years ago I attempted to teach a friend to crochet. It was much the same as you describe. As long as I was there with her, she did fine. Whenever she showed me what she had accomplished in my absence, almost 100% of the time it had to be ripped out and redone. She wore my patience thin, but later I was so glad that I had held my tongue and just continued to show her time and again the right way. A few months later she was diagnosed with a cancerous brain tumor and much too soon was gone.

 

Whatever her reasons, even if she is just lonely, trod lightly. If you must make an excuse for not being able to continue her lessons, please do the best you can not to hurt her feelings.:cry

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I agree with the one who posted about directing this woman to on line videos. Also, I have a Learn to Knit Visually book that I really like. I know that there is a crochet counterpart. I would suggest being gentle with your comments. It could really be devastating to suggest that she isn't able to crochet (well, it would have been devastating to me!). Is she trying to do too many stitches in one piece (like sc, dc, hdc, etc)?

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wow mudpie...I'm sorry to hear about your friend. I'm not going to discourage her; I was hoping to find maybe a "better" way to show her. I will give it a little more time and hope she catches on and I will suggest videos to crochet along with.

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It may be possible also that she is just really lacking in self confidence. When you are with her she is confident but on her own she may "second guess" herself and become lost in confusion. I dont know if you have given her a pattern to do, or just stitches. But if you havent already tried this, I would just have her make a simple sc square and turn it into a potholder. Maybe if she does this she will develop more self confidence.

HTH

Doreen

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