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Hello, I never seem to finish a project, but I love to try!


Nytowl223

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Hello 👋🏼 all,

I'm a mess! I am never good at finishing projects. I am an abandoned wife (after 38½ years - he filed for divorce the day after our 39th anniversary), so struggling with depression. He was my soulmate, my best friend, my everything, and he stole all that from me, chucked it in the dumpster, set fire to it, and walked away. So if I suddenly get all weird when any touchy subject comes up, think nothing of it.

I am 55 years old, nearly 56. I spent 2½ decades as a semi trailer mechanic, before a fall on ice and snow ruined my life. From that point on, apparently I was getting to be too much of an inconvenience, and when I had shoulder surgery that I had trouble recovering from, and then got pneumonia so bad I had to be hospitalized, well... I got really inconvenient. I had barely gotten home from the hospital before he packed his things and left. I was too much of an inconvenience to him. He had just retired (30 years & out early retirement) and had discovered his retirement wasn't what he had dreamed of it being. So, I guess he blamed it on me.

He told me he didn't "want to live in my world any more," whatever the ~bleeping bleep~ that's supposed to be. And it's been 16 months, but I still hurt as much as the day he left, and I've never found out when it changed from OUR world to just mine, either. 

 

Okay, that's the bad. The good? I have 2 adult sons that are disabled, but both with me and caring and gentlemanly and helpful and all the positives. They're what their dad was before he... lost his marbles, or had his midlife crisis, or whatever this is. The oldest is a pain, as he has the worst kind of bipolar disorder, but he loves me. The younger has fibromyalgia and spinal stenosis, which cause him a.lot of pain, but he keeps going, and tries his best. He can't work, because who wants an employee who randomly will have a fatigue day when they can barely even get out of bed. He hasn't gotten disability, yet, because the US government are bellends, top lefts, whatever you want to call them, where they can't give people what they need. I had to wait 4 years, myself, fighting again and again to get my own disability!

So, the younger one doesn't have disability, the oldest has the lowest amount of disability payment each month because he's always had it, since he was (IIRC) 7 years old, and I have disability. With what He Who Shall Not Be Bothered pays on the bills (which ain't much), we haven't starved, yet.

What do we do? We like to fish, to camp, we like music of most kinds - I like everything from Mozart and Monteverdi, Handel and Vivaldi, to modern heavy metal (ok, what I learned was heavy metal in 1980 - don't @ me, LOL!) like Five Finger Death Punch, Disturbed, Black Sabbath, Motörhead, Iron Maiden, Slayer, and Pantera, to blues like John Lee Hooker, BB King, Muddy Waters, Stevie Ray Vaughan, and Albert King. I like a lot of the stuff in between, in moderation. 😄 My boys like most of what I like, too, though they can't take too much Beethoven and Bach before they get itchy. 😉 

I love woodworking, painting (automotive, mural, and just painting wood projects), reusing & repurposing stuff that I want to keep out of the landfill, gardening (nothing tastes better than stuff you grow yourself!), baking, cake decorating (though I don't have as many to bake cakes for, now), and raising my featherbabies - my chickens, guineas, quail, and one grumpy gander. 😀  I want to get turkeys, again, a beautiful breed called Sweetgrass. I had 3 beauties, but they got killed by a predator. 😭 I lost nearly all of my Banty Cochins then, too. I still want to replace them, but am making sure new coops & pens are even more secure than what I thought I had them, before.

And, of course, I love to crochet! Otherwise, I wouldn't be here, would I? I have recently learned the Tunisian style, and am doing a 4th Doctor scarf in Tunisian knit stitch. I'm turning an old giant knitted sweater that I got for a single dollar into a reusable bag with a big pocket on each side, and may take apart the rest of it for the yarn out of it. I am getting about 4-5 bucks of yarn out of it, at minimum, plus a big bag!

And I have a stitch that my mom taught me back somewhere around the early to mid 1970s that she called a single-and-a-half crochet stitch. It's like nothing else I've seen anywhere. She also taught me a stitch she called a double-and-a-half stitch that I just recently learned is called a half double. But as I hunted and hunted, after that, I found not even a hint of the single-and-a-half stitch! I've seen people say it has to be a slip stitch, but the one she taught me is taller than single, and shorter than a double.

 

Anyway, that's the bad and the good, and I'd say the bad is also the ugly, too. Now, you know me pretty darned good! 

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Hello from Mississippi! Sounds like you've really had a rough patch but hopefully things are looking up for you. Crochet is calming and relaxing for me. If it is for you, then just enjoy the process and don't worry about whether the project gets finished right now.

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Welcome to the 'ville!  I'm sorry life has dealt you a lot of bleep but hopefully crochet is a soothing refuge.

I wonder if the single and a half stitch could be an extended single?  It is basically a foundation SC but you don't use the extra loop to make the next stitch into.  Here is a video that also give the written instructions below it.  There are also extended-other stitches, done the same way with an extra yo and pull thru at the beginning.

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Hi Villager,

I'm so sorry to hear the pain through your words, but it sounds like you are also able to see the many blessings in your life. I also have an adult child with bipolar, and I know how heartbreaking it is to see them struggle so much. You sound like a person with amazing creativity and talent! I wish we lived closer so I could see how you refinish and repurpose furniture. That's another area I've wanted to explore forever. 

Hang in there and keep crocheting!

Best, Rgoodrich

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