Crochet Gift not Appreciated!

[Rugratsx5]

I'm so sorry that happened to you. When I was younger and crochet my mom a blanket I can remember going to visit a week or so later and she had cut it into 2 pieces for her cats!! Needless to say she made a mess of it! She told me it wasn't quite right for her room! Never the less I never made anything for her again! I hope your feeling better and as you see your not alone!

[NeedSleep]

I'm so sorry that happened to you. When I was younger and crochet my mom a blanket I can remember going to visit a week or so later and she had cut it into 2 pieces for her cats!! Needless to say she made a mess of it! She told me it wasn't quite right for her room! Never the less I never made anything for her again! I hope your feeling better and as you see your not alone!

 

 

OMG. I want to physically come over and give you a real live hug. That's insane.

[HappyBunny]

Thanks everyone! At this point, I don't know what's happened to the shawl. I suspect my mother wasn't real happy when she didn't get a reaction from me when she said she was giving it back, so not sure what's happening with it now. My hope is that she will give it to my SIL who has MS. If she does return it to me, I will donate it.

 

Kim

[Cherokee2]

I'm sorry you had to go through this... mothers can be insensitive sometimes.

Years ago, before I learned to crochet, I sewed a lot, and got pretty good at it. So I made my mother a nice dress.. she wore it a couple times, seemed pleased with it at first... and then hung it in the closet. Not long after, my older sister was down for a visit, and my mother was going through the closet, handing her a stack of things she thought she could wear. In this stack was the dress I had made for her... and I walked into the room just about the time she told my sister.."you can have this, too, I never really liked it." So I vowed then and there not to ever make my mother another item of clothing, as long as I lived.

She is gone now, and I regret those times when I was hurt... or that I hurt her in some way. The point is.. maybe your mom didn't mean to hurt your feelings... maybe she knew that she would never really enjoy the shawl, so she offered to give it back. As for asking that you make some for her friends... that was a little much... but sometimes mothers are guilty of blurting out thoughts without thinking of how much those words hurt the person. If you let her know you were hurt, I bet she will apologize.

I've received gifts from my husband or kids over the years that I didn't like, didn't appreciate, and never used... but I generally try to keep that to myself.

My sister gave me a set of the ugliest cuptowels I ever saw, for Christmas.. I will never use them... so I stuck them back and some time in the next few years, I will give them back to her! How fair is that?!

[HappyBunny]

I'm sorry you had to go through this... mothers can be insensitive sometimes.

hurt her in some way. The point is.. maybe your mom didn't mean to hurt your feelings... maybe she knew that she would never really enjoy the shawl, so she offered to give it back. As for asking that you make some for her friends... that was a little much... but sometimes mothers are guilty of blurting out thoughts without thinking of how much those words hurt the person. If you let her know you were hurt, I bet she will apologize.

 

Hi, I appreciate your kind words but unfortunately in this case, it was done to be hurtful. I have lived with this my entire life.

 

Kim

[redpuppydog]

Kim:

 

I think you must be my long-lost sister, because it sounds like you got the same cruddy family I got stuck with. Mean-spirited, selfish and downright anti-social.

 

 

Yep, I too have had that happen to me. My brother and his long-term girlfriend was over my house once complaining about how their feet always get cold at their apartment. So, I got them some fuzzy socks and crocheted some house slippers for them as a gift. I thought I was being nice. Well, princess didn't like them. Turns out that if its not store-bought with a designer label on it, its completely worthless to her. So, she not only threw them away, she went around telling anyone who would listen how she toss out that 'worthless' gift and how 'stupid' I was for even trying to give her anything not 'designer'. (Yes, really!) Then my mom chewed me out for not buying princess the $50 designer house-shoes she really wanted. (Excuse me? Since when does anyone spend $50 on someone that rude and selfish?)

 

Needless to say, none of the three have gotten ANYTHING handmade or store-bought from me again. Never will. And since then, anytime I see mom, brother or princess, I use as few words as possible, and leave fast.

 

Like the others said, you cant change other people's rotten attitudes, all you can change is how much you are going to let their rotten attitude hurt you. Dr. Phil says you teach others how to treat you. It's true. If you aren't around to take their non-sense, it cant hurt you. When you refuse to deal with them, they lose their power. Get your shawl back, and give it too someone who will like it. I bet someone at a nursing home would love it.

[Tracey4610]

Thanks so much Maria and Lorry for being straightforward and saying exactly what I needed to hear! And thanks so much to everyone for reading my post and being so supportive and understanding. I can't tell you how much it means to me!

 

I don't have the shawl back yet but I can tell you when I do get it back, I'll be sure to find it an owner that will truly appreciate the work that went into it!

 

Kim

 

 

Hey, Kim, If your mom doesn't want it, I know a fellow crocheter who would definitely appreciate it.

[Tracey4610]

Kim:

 

I think you must be my long-lost sister, because it sounds like you got the same cruddy family I got stuck with. Mean-spirited, selfish and downright anti-social.

 

 

Yep, I too have had that happen to me. My brother and his long-term girlfriend was over my house once complaining about how their feet always get cold at their apartment. So, I got them some fuzzy socks and crocheted some house slippers for them as a gift. I thought I was being nice. Well, princess didn't like them. Turns out that if its not store-bought with a designer label on it, its completely worthless to her. So, she not only threw them away, she went around telling anyone who would listen how she toss out that 'worthless' gift and how 'stupid' I was for even trying to give her anything not 'designer'. (Yes, really!) Then my mom chewed me out for not buying princess the $50 designer house-shoes she really wanted. (Excuse me? Since when does anyone spend $50 on someone that rude and selfish?)

 

Needless to say, none of the three have gotten ANYTHING handmade or store-bought from me again. Never will. And since then, anytime I see mom, brother or princess, I use as few words as possible, and leave fast.

 

Like the others said, you cant change other people's rotten attitudes, all you can change is how much you are going to let their rotten attitude hurt you. Dr. Phil says you teach others how to treat you. It's true. If you aren't around to take their non-sense, it cant hurt you. When you refuse to deal with them, they lose their power. Get your shawl back, and give it too someone who will like it. I bet someone at a nursing home would love it.

 

Y'know, you could design your own slippers, slap a label on it, and then tell them it's a designer item.

[Rugratsx5]

OMG. I want to physically come over and give you a real live hug. That's insane.

 

Thank you so much..You are so sweet!! In reading all the posts I am feeling a little better..I thought I was the only one with people like that in my family!! I have 5 kids and can't imagine ever...ever doing something like that to any of them!! There is a bright side..I guess thats where we become the better parents...:cheerand change things for the better so history doesn't repeat itself!!

[SPRAT605]

WOW! That is sooooooooo stinky to do! After reading all these posts I too am feeling better! I have a very controlling mother too! But she go and tells her friends about all the great things I do but to me is always critising and negative. I love my mother because she is my mom.... but I don't have to like her or the way she acts. It is interesting to see how many women have problems with their moms. This is definietly the place to come and talk! Thanks everyone! :manyheart:manyheart

 

And to Kim.... Remember that you can never change someone that doesn't want to and but like alot of women have said on here..... If you can poosibly not react to her.... they lose control and it starts to not be as "fun" for them And for me things are better now that I relized that I love her .... but I don't have to like her. And that I can be polite to anyone... even people that I don't like!:manyheart:yay