Pushy Lady at the LYS

[Lyndamic]

Yesterday I went to my local LYS. I was "helped" by the owner, whom I had never met before. I had chosen some plain wool for a couple of scarves, and she made me feel ashamed of it and steered me to hand-painted, much higher priced stuff that I really couldn't afford.

 

I ended up buying it, because there was a large group of regulars sitting around knitting, making comments to me like "didn't I want my project to be special", and how the fancy yarn was just so much more luxurious.

 

The yarn IS nice, but I feel really upset about letting myself be manipulated that way. I blame myself; because after all, her livelihood depends on selling the yarn. Of course she wants me to buy more. But I feel like I don't want to ever go back. It was like peer-pressure in Jr. high school!

 

The people at this particular shop are also kind of snarky about crocheters. I taught a girl I work with to knit and crochet, and told her about this shop (prior to the above incident). She went in to buy wool, and when she mentioned that she intended to crochet something with it, people laughed, and encouraged her to knit with it.

 

I do love the yarns they carry in this shop, but I hate to give them my business. There is another little yarn store within driving distance, but they don't have half the stock of the rude place.

 

What would you do?

[Tiga]

Not go back to the rude place, and buy my special order stuff online for cheaper.

[Krakovianka]

I'd be really tempted to go back in to "window-shop," and make a point of mentioning that you just want to check out brands, but plan to order online because you don't appreciate being pressured to spend more than you can afford, or having your craft denigrated by others.

 

But I probably wouldn't do it, either.

[nana5boys]

the nerve of some owners. pressuring you to buy something you can't really afford.

i just wouldn't go back and i'd make it a point of telling others to be cautionous cuz' this is what they might do. i guess i'd also go in and just look ard. and do the same thing and mention that i can get it cheaper somewhere else. just for the fun of it.

 

jaye

[Titus2woman]

OH dear one! I am really angry for you! For some reason this has me REALLY riled up! (((((HUGS))))) sandi

[Scorpio59]

It would be nice to be able to see and feel the yarns before you order elsewhere. So you could go back to look and simply say- you don't have your wallet (leave the purse in the car- just carry in your keys. If she pressures you with questions about your projects say "I'm in between projects and just browsing". Don't make eye-contact. Move slowly away. Don't look at the ladies knitting. See how that goes.

 

 

Or if you do not plan to go there again- write her a letter and tell her what you think about your shopping experience there.

 

We have a LYS with spinning wheels, etc near here. The owner is NOT high pressure. I love to browse.

[Lyndamic]

Thanks for the replies, ladies. I feel a little better about it, just from you all understanding.

 

So you could go back to look and simply say- you don't have your wallet (leave the purse in the car- just carry in your keys. If she pressures you with questions about your projects say "I'm in between projects and just browsing". Don't make eye-contact. Move slowly away. Don't look at the ladies knitting.

 

That is a good idea, and I might give it a try. I had never had a problem there before, and the owner had never been in when I happened to go. Her sales ladies never acted that way. Maybe I'll get lucky and she won't be there! I won't buy anything there again.

[lhasaapsolady]

I don't think I'd go back, I'd look for a shop online that carries the yarn I was looking for.

[Katchkan]

To be honest it's not what you wanted. Return it. Tell them it's the wrong color, Your customer hated it. Whatever, Then buy what you intended to in the first place.

 

In passing mention that you had felt pressured to buy the yarn even though you had doubts about it.

You don't need to get rude. You don't need to raise a big issue. Just state the facts and be done.

I know if it was me, I would resent them everytime I picked up that yarn. So better to have it gone and have something I would enjoy using.

[kazily]

I would write a note to the business. A lot of places take very seriously when customers make comments, either positive or negative because their business is to sell as much as possible & they usually want to know what attracts people to buy & what is distracting, & lowering sales. Tell them in the letter what you love about the store & also what may keep you from spending your money there.

 

Pertaining to crochet, I'd clip a gorgeous top off the net or from a mag & send it with the note saying that this is todays crochet & uses LOTS OF YARN TO CROCHET IT.

 

As far as customers sitting around knitting...well, they knit...so crocheting is as foreign to them as knitting is some of us lol. They obviously think crochet is for granny's or something. Consider them ignorant of crochet. And some people are just rude no matter what craft they do, if any crafting at all. I think that was rude what they did. If you feel like educating them next time, tell them that you love crochet & that it makes lovely lacy things.

[Lefthook]

I would do three things:

 

return it

 

write a letter (or several--one to her and one to the head office if it's a chain)

 

NEVER go back and tell her why, hopefully within hearing distance of the knitting ladies

[psxmom]

I personally would find somewhere else to purchase, someone who appreciates the business and the customers needs, wants, and budget constraints. Life is to short to deal with rude shop owners for any reason, and quite frankly I knit and crochet and find crocheting more relaxing most of the time even though I have knit longer.

 

Have a happy and healthy holiday and new year.

 

 

Deanna

[esiepiela]

WOW..the nerve of some people. I would take the yarn back and be honest with the owner...tell her that she pressured you into buying something that you didn't want and couldn't afford. I would return the yarn and not go back there. Its rude and unprofessional. She is there not to sell you something that you don't want but to help you find what you DO want...period...end of discussion.

[crpstx]

I'd go back in and if she bothered me again, I would tell her when I have made my decision, I'll let her know!! As for the group of knitters, (by the way, I knit too) they are a bunch of rude so and so's and aren't even worth you giving them the time of day. And, I agree, return the yarn and tell her the truth, you felt pressured to purchase it, and if she wants to keep you as a customer, butt out!!!

[trin]

Thanks for the replies, ladies. I feel a little better about it, just from you all understanding.

 

 

 

That is a good idea, and I might give it a try. I had never had a problem there before, and the owner had never been in when I happened to go. Her sales ladies never acted that way. Maybe I'll get lucky and she won't be there! I won't buy anything there again.

 

I wouldn't really go back... except maybe to feel up yarns and then order them online...

I'd also RETURN the yarn I didn't want in the first place. Also, write a POLITE letter after you've made your return, explaining WHY you made your return and that you do not intend to return to their shop. Explain very clearly and politely that you were HUMILIATED into buying yarn that wasn't 1) what you needed 2) too expensive for you.

 

Encourage the little friendly LYS, even if you occasionally ask them to order something special in for you. (Even if you discovered it at the "OTHER" place.)

[MrsLewis907]

My first thought was...write a letter.

 

I'd probably give the place a second chance, especially because you say you've been there before and not had this problem. I would take the yarn back and tell them you didn't want it, and it's not really what you needed (and if it was the owner who was there again, I'd say it's not really what you wanted in the first place either), and also write a letter specifically to the owner saying that you felt very uncomfortable and unhappy with your last shopping experience, with details, and that you are contemplating ever shopping there again due to that experience, and what you did afterwards (returning the yarn anyways).

 

People really shouldn't pressure you like that, they should be happy for any business you do give them. As for the other knitters, that's simply rediculous...people need to grow up (and I mean that for their actions and manners, not their abilities for knit vs crochet, or anything like that).

[snugsmontreal]

i dont know why knitters can be so rude, and i am a knitter, i knit a lot and i crochet a lot i think each has its strong/weak points and ill admit somethings look better in knit, but some look better in crochet too especially lacey things (knit lace is soooo not as good i think) i would return it too, there is no need for you to feel a pinch because she feels a pinch, it is like the way i feel about charity you dont give away the money you eat with to feed someone else even if they need it, so do you.

 

there is a knitting shop owner (she used to write for vogue knit mag and some other snooty publications) she doesnt crochet and literally every time you go in her shop she wont give yo uthe time of day because she sits there and knits, if you need help you have to go bug her. it is kind of nice that she just leaves you be and doesnt pressure you at all, the only pressure she has ever given me was to make sure i bought enough for my project of a sale yarn since it was discontinued and she wouldnt get more in.

[Lyndamic]

i dont know why knitters can be so rude, and i am a knitter,

 

As for the group of knitters, (by the way, I knit too) they are a bunch of rude so and so's

 

I know! I knit too, and I don't understand their attitude. In my mind, yarn craft is yarn craft. I was not even aware of the whole some-knitters-look-down-on-crochet thing.

 

I am too shy to go back and return the yarn and stand there and explain why...I didn't even stick up for myself when the scene was occurring. I could return the yarn and then write a letter, though. Maybe the owner didn't understand that I felt really pressured, and it would help her serve customers better in the future.

[magiccrochetfan]

Lyndamic, what a yucky experience! I'd be really upset if I had a whole group of people trying to manipulate me into spending money, not to mention laughing at the idea of crochet! Hugs to you:hug

 

I had a shop owner (the Yarn Basket in Osage Beach) tell me I should not crochet, I should knit, "because knitting is so much nicer". I laughed and told her I did not agree with that. I didn't buy anything, had just gone in to look.

 

Since I am in MO, I am really curious as to where this happened, if you care to say. If I go to that shop I'd like to be prepared to be assertive with the owner and to ignore the peanut gallery

 

If I were you, I would definitely return this unwanted yarn and get a refund.

[Lyndamic]

Kathy -

 

I have sent you a pm.

[Katchkan]

Kathy -

 

I have sent you a pm.

If you sent me a pm I haven't received it.

[magiccrochetfan]

Hi Kathy. That is me that Lyndamic pm'ed. Hope you are having a great day, I know you are crocheting and creating beautiful things:)

[Lyndamic]

If you sent me a pm I haven't received it.

 

I'm sorry for the confusion, I was referring to the other Kathy!

[dubbee]

Look, I'm 46 and could give a hoot what someone thinks about me. When you get to a certain age you have to put you a little higher up on the priority pole. We take care of our families, we take care of bills, we take care of households, we take care of our businesses, we take care of our parents.....

We crochet because it's OURS. It relaxes us, it grounds us, it gives us me time. it's a wonderful time to talk to God, it's our menu planning time, it's our scheduling time, it lets us be creative, it builds our self esteem, it helps us realize how special we are.

I can understand how intimidating the experience was. I have a somewhat local yarn shop where the extra-special-better-than-crocheters knitting ladies look down their noses at us crocheters. Who can't seem to understand why on earth we would use that ridiculously expensive yarn for anything BUT knitting.

I asked if they had crochet circles, more crochet books and magazines and hooks besides the 3 or 4 displayed. As a hush fell over the shop, she said "no but we do offer knitting classes." In MY moment of weakness I did buy an overpriced handmade wooden hook case.

I did share my thoughts about the lack of support for us crocheters.

She then steered me to another LYS who maybe more to my liking.

Haven't been back since. But I'm glad that I said what was on my mind. If I had the finances, I would definitely open a LYSFCO.

Local Yarn Shop For Crocheters Only!!

Well, I wouldn't treat knitters like outcasts JUST because they may not crochet. Yarns are used to create BEAUTY. Whether it's knitted or crocheted, it's handmade with patience, creativity, love & devotion

[Empress Busy Bee]

To be honest it's not what you wanted. Return it. Tell them it's the wrong color, Your customer hated it. Whatever, Then buy what you intended to in the first place.

That's what I would do.

If you like the yarn selection there and feel you'd miss it, go there. However LOOK them in the eyes. If you don't as suggested above, it makes you seem guilty and shifty to them.

 

Look, I'm 46 and could give a hoot what someone thinks about me. When you get to a certain age you have to put you a little higher up on the priority pole.

Exactly!

It's your money, spend it how you want.