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Maybe I'm overeacting, however....


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My usual response to this kind of question is "Why yes I do have so much more free time since I've eliminated the need for sleep." I suffer from insomnia so this is partially true. Instead of laying in bed praying for sleep, I crochet to unwind from a stressful day. DH wasn't happy the one morning he came to bed and ended up being poked in the back with my tiny steel hook. Since then, he's requested I don't work on doilies and filet in bed.

 

Don't let them get you down for how you spend your free time. It's better then sitting around like zombies in front of the TV.

 

Hugs and Cookies

Auntie K

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I actually have received that comment more than once. But you know what? I don't choose to be offended or insulted because I try not to let others dictate to me how I should feel or act. Having said that, my usual response has been something along the lines of: We have more time than we realize and we make time to do the things that we enjoy doing.

 

When I phrase it that way they usually agree with that and list the things they do with their time. Not everyone enjoys or appreciates crafting/DIY/creative outlets. So I don't expect them to understand. I don't really enjoy the game of Bridge, but there are lots of Bridge clubs around. If I tell someone about my hobby and they aren't interested, it really isn't personal. It is just not their cup of tea. Come on, now. Haven't we all had someone tell us about something that we found boring or stupid? My 10 year old son is constantly telling me the intricate detailed plots of his video games-while I am not rude about being uninterested I certainly am not on the edge of my seat :lol

 

That's why I usually reserve my crochet talk to crochet forums and my monthly crochet meetup. Well...I do bug my SO with my projects too :lol

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I usually take the statement "you must have a lot of spare time" to mean that the project looks too big or complicated to that person. Like they would never be able to accomplish the task. In a way I take it as a compliment because I know that it doesn't take too much time for me, that it is something that I am good at. I have kids, so most people certainly know that I don't have any spare time, just the time I carve out of my sleep time!:lol Maybe I am just to oblivious to see the put down when they talk about my spare time.

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I got that nonsense, too. It's sort of a reflection of our society, though. We brag and boast about how we "are too busy," like it's something to be proud of. I think you should be proud of the fact that you have a balanced life, where you make the time for a craft that's so important to you. I think if more people stopped their personal rat races and made more time for creativity, this world would be a better place.

 

I really agree with this. When did it become shameful to have a lot of free time? It's a blessing to have the time to express ourselves creatively, and every human being is entitled to it.

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Comments like that just totally burn me! There's no reason for them but to be hurtful even if they are said in a deceptively 'nice' way. Its a thinly veiled slam no matter how you look at it. I totally agree though that it comes from someone who is feeling bad about themselves in some way and its best just to ignore ~ although sometime we just can't!! :angry

I can get myself very upset/depressed by this type of comment because it usually comes from someone in my life who has children (& therefore less spare time) & who knows I don't. They seem to feel its their duty to remind me time & again that if I did have children I wouldn't be able to do all things I do. They don't seem to understand that I would love to have children, but my life just hasn't worked out that way and there's not a whole lot I can do about it.... well, I'm about to get on a total rant here, so I'll leave it at that or else I'll end up totally depressed again!

I just wish I knew why our 'friends' can be so mean! :(

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My my how many times i've heard that before! It is hurtful and upsetting but I guess they are just jealous. I have a 2 1/2 year old at home. my hubby works till 10:30pm 5 days a week. I get home from work around 5. clean up, feed my daughter, make dinner. put my daughter to sleep around 8 or so and get out my hook and crochet while I watch tv. Sorry I'd rather be home where I know my daughter will sleep the same time everyday and have a regular schedule which gives me more time instead of spending all my time out and about like they do.

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I agree with what Leanne said; I can't imagine what people without creative hobbies get out of life.

 

Even when I'm not actively engaged in my hobbies, I'm thinking about them. I went two years without sewing (my former only hobby) anything, but I still *thought* about what I'd make all the time.

 

And I've always cooked and made up recipes.

 

My mother, she doesn't have a creative bone in her body, and just doesn't understand the mess the creative process makes, or how I can ignore a sink full of dishes to work on a project.

 

Me, I say let the dishes wait; life is to short to spend it cleaning!

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Oh I get comments too like this... I have a 1 year old son (who is sitting on my lap right now by the way) and people say things like "How do you have time to do that with a baby?" and it makes me think they think I'm not doing my job as a mother, and just spend all my time crocheting, and not taking care of him. I hate having to defend myself, and say things like that I crochet when he naps etc... Also, well meaning people say that we are lucky to be able for me to stay home with my son, and that I'm lucky to have the extra free time. True, I am SOO thankful that I can stay home with Josh, but it does take sacrifice to do this. We don't have as much money as if I worked too, so we can't do as many of the things that we really might rather do. However, I think it's worth it to be home to raise my son. Everyone lives life differently, and we just all have to figure out a way to get along, or ignore eachother lol. :)

Victoria

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You could tell them next time...

 

"Crochet is my sanity... perhaps you would like me to teach you?"

and then yell

"You Freak!":kick

and then just never talk with that person again.

 

Or

"Crocheting makes me a nicer person, perhaps you could try it too?!"

and then yell

"You Jerk!" :neener

 

I find that sometimes just ignoring stupid comments is best...

but, sometimes it feels better if you tell them that you didn't like it & why.

Jealousy was the 1st thing that came to mind.:yes

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You could also do the reverse-psychology thing and say, "Why, yes, I do, and I'm so glad that I can manage my time to have enough spare time to indulge in my hobbies. Everyone should be so lucky."

 

:sofunny OH I love that answer!! I have to remember that one. Growing up, Saturday morning was clean house AND then the afternoon was for goofing off. We sewed much of our own clothes too. So INDULGE in your hobbies - they are just jealous they probably don't know how to do some crafts. :heehee

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I've found crochet is great with a busy life. What better thing to take to my son's soccer practices and games? The beauty of it is that I can spend quality time with my family while I do it, whether it's at a soccer game or chilling at the house. I mean, what do these critics think--that you have to shut out your loved ones to do this?! Point out to them that you can multi-task even if they can't!

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my BIL and FIL were questioning me about my crochet, asking "about how long" it took to make something. when i told them i could finish a starghan in a week, they were both shocked. they both thought it was literally MONTHS of work. :eek maybe your friend just doesnt realize how fast things go once you get into the groove? :think i wouldnt let her bother you, maybe write her a note and supply her with a couple fab crocheted items....small quick ones. (scarf, dishcloth...etc) and tell her in the note you took X amount of time out of your "ohsobusy" day to think nice thoughts of her. its passive aggressive, but should get your point across....:hook

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I get that a lot from my younger co-workers when I bring in things to show the craftier people that I work with. I just let it go. They are so busy shopping and partying that they barely have time left to sleep. Such a sad way to live. I am so much more fun to be around when I am creating something.

 

Shaunna

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Hi Rhane: I saw your post about your friends commenting about too much

spare time etc. Well, I have been crocheting for over 30 years and I love it.

When people comment about how much crocheting I do, I tell them that

crocheting is my therapy and costs much less!! I also tell them that those

who go for therapy for one hour a week have a lot less to show for their

time than we do with our crocheting. Truth is there are times when I exist

on four hours sleep a night if I am working on something that needs to be

done by a certain time.

 

Have fun with your crocheting and know that there are many of us out here

who would rather crochet than have immaculate houses etc.

 

Buttercup

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I get that too, I'm sorry it hurt your feelings. The typical person watches HOURS of television per day. How do THEY find the time? At least with this, you're DOING something, you have something to SHOW for your hard work. How easy is it to watch tv??

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I've heard a variation of this, in the sense that whenever I tell someone how wonderful it is to know how to crochet (or knit), they ALWAYS say, "Oh, I don't have time for that." To which, I always reply, "Do you watch television?" And of course, they always admit that they do watch the old boob-tube. So then I say, "Then you have plenty of time to crochet because once you get the hang of it, you can watch t.v. while crocheting". In your situation, I think it's a perfectly valid question to ask them what they do with their spare time. Everyone wastes so much time running around shopping and watching t.v. these days. I hate shopping so I do as little of it as possible. But all my friends, even my SAHM friends, spend hours and hours every week shopping and watching t.v. And these are the same folks who say, "Oh, I'm so busy". So don't believe it. We moderns are just way too spoiled.

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:tup So true!
I get that too, I'm sorry it hurt your feelings. The typical person watches HOURS of television per day. How do THEY find the time? At least with this, you're DOING something, you have something to SHOW for your hard work. How easy is it to watch tv??
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It's good to see that other people thought the same thing I did concerning how much time people waste of completely frivolous activities such as shopping (a.k.a. retail therapy) and watching t.v.

 

I get that a lot from my younger co-workers when I bring in things to show the craftier people that I work with. I just let it go. They are so busy shopping and partying that they barely have time left to sleep. Such a sad way to live. I am so much more fun to be around when I am creating something.

 

Shaunna

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Oh I get comments too like this... I have a 1 year old son (who is sitting on my lap right now by the way) and people say things like "How do you have time to do that with a baby?" and it makes me think they think I'm not doing my job as a mother, and just spend all my time crocheting, and not taking care of him. I hate having to defend myself, and say things like that I crochet when he naps etc... Also, well meaning people say that we are lucky to be able for me to stay home with my son, and that I'm lucky to have the extra free time. True, I am SOO thankful that I can stay home with Josh, but it does take sacrifice to do this. We don't have as much money as if I worked too, so we can't do as many of the things that we really might rather do. However, I think it's worth it to be home to raise my son. Everyone lives life differently, and we just all have to figure out a way to get along, or ignore eachother lol. :)

Victoria

 

Hi Victoria,

 

Your reply here reminded me of something funny my MIL said to me. This really doesn't have to do with crochet, but it's funny so I'll share it anyhow. I was showing her a video that I made of my baby in her crib. It was a fairly long video of her because I wanted to capture her when she was at that age when she'd lay on her back and just kick her legs and move her arms around (a.k.a. flap her wings). I loved that stage, and I knew it wouldn't last too long. So my MIL says to me, after watching for a few minutes, "You know, when you were taking this video, you could have been doing housework instead." I was just totally floored by the comment. I wasn't angry because it was just too ridiculous. I just said, "Yeah, you're right" and continued watching the video. But later on when I was alone, I thought of the greatest reply. I should have said, "You can't see it from the video, but I was doing housework. With my other arm, I was stirring a pot of soup, and my right foot was folding laundry, and my..."

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