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Does anyone else's SO not support you?


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My DH accepts my obsession with crochet because it makes me happy. That's not to say that he wants to talk about it - why I chose a particular yarn or edge pattern - but he has chosen a pattern for me to crochet when it was for our home and he notices and appreciates the finished products.

 

Your DH sounds like my ex boyfriend. He complained about the expense and the "mess" (one bag in the living room) and so I stopped doing what I loved for quite some time until I realized he didn't care about crochet or any of the other things he criticized about me, he just wanted to be in control of whatever I was doing.

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My DH accepts my obsession with crochet because it makes me happy. That's not to say that he wants to talk about it - why I chose a particular yarn or edge pattern - but he has chosen a pattern for me to crochet when it was for our home and he notices and appreciates the finished products.

 

Your DH sounds like my ex boyfriend. He complained about the expense and the "mess" (one bag in the living room) and so I stopped doing what I loved for quite some time until I realized he didn't care about crochet or any of the other things he criticized about me, he just wanted to be in control of whatever I was doing.

 

That's my thoughts exactly. Seems like a control thing. My ex husband bashed all the hobbies I had and he was super duper controlling. But I always think it's an attempt to control the other person when a SO tries to say what their partner should and should not do. My DH now supports me in everything I do (even when I crochet instead of clean, lol.) and I support my DH in all he does (tinkering with cars).

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Meaning, does anyone else's SO not support your crocheting? My DH doesn't like my crocheting, considers it a waste of time. :(
I'm very sorry he doesn't care for your beloved hobby. I wonder if he saw other people rave over your finished items with delight if that would subtly change his mind?
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I'm very sorry he doesn't care for your beloved hobby. I wonder if he saw other people rave over your finished items with delight if that would subtly change his mind?

 

Probably not, if control is what he's looking for. Such praise would only make his negative feelings worse, b/c she's receiving praise from outsiders (third parties) he cannot control. *sigh*

 

DCM, raised in a dysfunctional family; I've seen this dynamic

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Probably not, if control is what he's looking for. Such praise would only make his negative feelings worse, b/c she's receiving praise from outsiders (third parties) he cannot control. *sigh*

 

DCM, raised in a dysfunctional family; I've seen this dynamic

You may very well be right, but since we can't read his mind...
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Is everything he does productive? I'll bet not, and if that's the case, he's wrong.

 

Does he feel you're neglecting your share of chores around the house and/or obsessive about crocheting? If the latter, he may be a little bit right.

 

Crochet can be as effective as yoga for some people for de-stressing, and that makes it productive even if you don't sell your stuff for a profit. I crochet in front of the TV at night because I can't just sit still and do nothing, even though I'm tired. After all these years without cigarettes, I still need something to do with my hands, and the hook does the trick.

 

Crocheting has not always been just a hobby. Women saved Ireland from total starvation during the potato famine by crocheting Irish lace and selling it to the wealthy of Europe.

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It's your time to "waste" in whatever way you see fit :)

 

I'm one of the lucky ones in that my hubby encourages me in all of my hobbies even when rolling his eyes and biting his tongue because he can't use the kitchen table because it has my sewing on it or he sits on the sofa and gets a hook jab him from a wip lying around ;)

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Ravenaier, hopefully in time your DH will come to respect your hobby and see how productive and useful it is. After all each to his own! I am lucky both my DH and children and even my friends are all very supportive of my hobby. In fact most would say my hobby defines me! People refer to me as 'the girl who crochets the blankets with names on them' - so that who I am!

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my hubby only think's its a waist of time beacuse I do not sell every item I make rite away. and when I sell something he expects 100 % of the money to pay a bill.. then complains when I don't sell anything for a hwile.. It old him I coulda made more if you let me keep half themoney from the last thing I sold so I could get more yarn!!!!

 

but he don't care anymore. he knows Crochet keeps me out of his hair and I don't nag him when Im hookin LOL

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