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12" squares for my 11yo son - Updated: Pics in Post #1 Thnx everyone!!


mescovedo

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Like so many other of these posts - I hate asking this b/c hardly ever is it good news. Last week we discovered my 11 year old son has been cutting himself. That in itself was really hard to take in. I had emailed his teachers to make them aware of what was happening (he was doing this in school) so they can keep an eye on him. I called his dr the next morning and they referred me to a facility in town for an assessment. During the assessment he revealed that he's had thoughts of suicide. He's been really stressed out about starting middle school and it was such a big change for him that he had a lot of anxiety issues over it. He was acting out in class b/c he didn't want to be known as a "geek" (he's a very smart kid) so he kind of "dumbed himself down to make the others feel better". Well after that assessment, they (and in retrospect myself) felt it was necessary for him to be admitted inpatient there for 7-10 days. I've been a wreck. This was Thursday; Friday I couldn't even go to work as I couldn't stop crying, I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep and I couldn't go see him until Saturday. I felt so much better after getting to visit with him this weekend; but omg how I miss him sooo much. His brother and stepfather and I just feel so empty without him there with us. They have him on medication and he wants to come home but knows he can't just yet and he really truly seems to be doing so much better. Even after the release he'll still need to see a therapist for a while.

 

Anyway - here's to my request. I don't have a release date for him yet (I'm hoping to get some news on that today). He loves my crochet and I would love to be able to get one together for him more quickly than I can make a full blanket by myself. I'm having a hard time focusing as it is. So what I'm asking for are 12" squares. Any pattern that's not girly in dark greens, cream, and browns (tans any shades of brown). My aim is a total of 28 12" squares so I can put them together to fit his bed. If you can find the time to do up a square that would be great - PM me for my addy. And if you wanted to include a note or a card for him just to let him know how many people are pulling for him and how many people in this world care about him (even without knowing him personally) - just that they care enough to make a square to create something that's just for him would be awesome.

 

Sorry so long - thanks for hearing me out so far!

-Melissa

 

** Update: Well my home computer crashed and I've spent all weekend fixing it - stupid viruses! I don't know WHY people would make something so destructive and annoying and keeps me away from the 'ville!!! :lol Well I have finished my son's blanket - I have 4 squares come in afterwards that I'm going to make into deco pillows for him to match :) but I need to go get a couple pillow forms for that, but shouldn't take long. HE LOVES IT!!! THANKS SO MUCH EVERYONE!!! **

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I'm so sorry to hear your son's having difficulty. I had a really hard time with school at that age too, to the point where I was prescribed valium just to get me to the point where I could walk through the doors. The kids in my life now tell me it's a lot harder these days too. He's not alone, not by any stretch. I'd love to help with a square but I'm away from my hooks on business this week. Keep updating, if I'm back in time I'll do my best.

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I am sorry that you and your family are going through this. I had the same issues when I was your son's age. I am so happy that you found out about the problem, and are dealing with it. My parents were too busy to ever notice my problems until I wound up on drugs, alcoholic and pregnant. They never did find out about the cutting. I have a feeling that your son will be just fine because you obviously love him and are doing everything you can to help him out. I've never made a square to send to anyone before, but in this case I believe I will. Soon as I get it done, I will PM you for the address. I'll also be praying for your family.

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I am sorry that you and your family are going through this. I had the same issues when I was your son's age. I am so happy that you found out about the problem, and are dealing with it. My parents were too busy to ever notice my problems until I wound up on drugs, alcoholic and pregnant. They never did find out about the cutting. I have a feeling that your son will be just fine because you obviously love him and are doing everything you can to help him out. I've never made a square to send to anyone before, but in this case I believe I will. Soon as I get it done, I will PM you for the address. I'll also be praying for your family.

 

Thank you so much. As I told another 'viller who is donating a square to me - this really came as a shock to us. He seemed so happy; and luckily we caught this early as he's only started his cutting a few weeks ago. When I first saw it he lied to me telling me he fell and got cut up and even though I knew that's not what it looked like, it wasn't him to lie to me and I wanted to believe him. But then when it happened the second time; same kind of cuts in the same place, I knew. He tried to lie again and again and finally fessed up. In one of our sessions he said that he thought we were all too busy to come to and thought that at 11 years old he should handle his own problems. We told him no matter how busy we seem to be we'll never ever be too busy for him and that no matter how old he ever gets its ok to ask others for help with his problems. That we are his parents and its our job to be there and help him. There were tears on all sides and as hard as all this is for all of us and as hard as it is to be away from him I know he's getting help and I know he's in a safe place.

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I'm so sorry your family is going through this. :hug to you and your son- I think lots of kids have trouble adjusting to the transitions of middle- and high school, but don't let on. Your son is very lucky that you were paying attention and caught his difficulty early.

I can make a green square for you but I cannot send it out until Friday. If that's ok, please PM me with your address.

I hope you hear some good news about him soon. :hug

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I want to thank everyone so far who has be so giving of your time and prayers and thoughts in donating squares for my son. I know he will love this. And by focusing on something else during the day while I count down the hours until I can go visit him, it's helping me too. I have 8 people offering to donate a square and a friend of mine at work who taught me to crochet will be doing a couple as well so I'm off to a good start. I'm truly grateful to everyone. Again, thank you everyone for everything.

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Thank you so much. I just love the way everyone here on the 'ville supports everyone and is so helpful. From hearing us out when we just need to vent to helping put together comfortghans for those in need. I'm so very grateful to have this site to go to. I just know my son will love this comfortghan.

 

On a different note, I spoke with the facility he's at this morning and at the moment it's looking like he won't be comping home any earlier than Thursday - depending on his progress. I did speak with him at last night's visit about the importance of focusing on himself while there rather than trying to fix all the other kids' problems. If he doesn't make personal progress he'll have to stay longer.

 

So again, thank you everyone for the squares and the prayers. With the donations here I should have at least 1/2 of the squares needed for the comfortghan at this point. :hug

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I went through this with my daughter when she was ending 8th grade. She cut herself several different times. It was a rough few years and still our relationship isnt the best. I will pray for you and your family everything works out for you. Take care of yourself.

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I didn't get mine finished up last night like I wanted to, and still need about 1.5" for it to be the right size. I'll be going out again Friday to run some more errands so I'll drop it in the mail Friday.

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Please PM your address and I'll send you a square or two. If you would like to add knit squares in there, I have a few of those done. If not, I can see what I can send out tomorrow afternoon or so.

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I really wish I had the time to make a square for your son but i am already way behind in things I need to make. I did want to take the time to let you know that you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. :hugs This is alot to go through. Your son is very lucky to have such a caring mom like you on his side. :yes

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Thank you Brenda - prayers are always welcome! I can't contact the facility to see about his status and if they have a timeline regarding discharge until 10:30 so I'm hoping to have an update later this morning.

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Please PM me your address. I will whip up 2 for you and get them ready to post. My prayers are with your whole family for strength at this difficult separation. Thank goodness your son is getting good help. You are a very strong mother for addressing his needs so quickly, rather than choosing to wait-and-see.

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Yay! Good news is my son will get to come home Friday morning! He'll still be having to see a dr and a therapist once home, but at least he will be home. They said once he started to focus on himself instead of the other patients he really made progress. I'm just so happy to be able to get him home soon!! And so excited to be able to get this afghan put together for him! He's going to love it! I'm still short on squares so if anyone has the time to donate a square I would really appreciate it! I'm lacking around 10 would be my guess (that's counting the ones that others have offered to donate) and I'm trying to crochet like crazy between work and visitation hours at the facility to get more done as well.

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